Whew! That’s the expression that comes to mind after catching up on the last few episodes of The Red Table, hosted by Jada Pickett-Smith. The topics ranged from the highly speculated relationship between her and her mega star husband, Will Smith, race relations between African-American women and White women, and the importance of communication as it relates to allowing rumors to dictate your relationship with someone, and the affects of divorce. I was moved on so many levels that I found myself jotting down my un-filtered thoughts on the nearest piece of paper:
- I’m angry. During Jada’s conversation with Leah Remini, whom she’d been having a silent feud with for many years, Leah and Jada bonded over their hot tempers. Leah commented that there have been times that she leapt across the table at someone. Of course, as she admitted, that wasn’t the proper response in a business meeting but at the same time I was impressed about how passionate she was about ensuring that she wasn’t taken advantage of. How freeing would that be?
- How can I feel abandoned by my dad and he lived with me my whole childhood?
- My actions–good and bad– in my life are adding to the pain my children will feel in their lives.
- My late husband and I were almost in that place that Jada and Will expressed about their relationship–a space of allowing each other to be who they are. Not looking to the other to fulfill their lives. Just loving each other and having the confidence and security of knowing someone was in your corner.
- A female white friend would be cool. Specifically, to get some incite into the relationship challenges they have with their men. I really want to believe that men problems are universal. But I’ll never know if I’m only surrounded by my own race of women. And I struggle in my sincere friendships with them.