You don’t drink. You don’t smoke. You don’t dabble in drugs. You don’t hang out at night clubs. Every other word out of your mouth isn’t an unpleasant four-letter word. Then why would such a person get involved in relationship of any kind with a person who does any of the above?
In her book, The Power of a Praying Wife, Stormie Omartian shared in the introduction how the little cute annoying things about her husband that she tolerated with love in the beginning of their relationship eventually became BIG ugly things that made her want to inflict bodily harm onto her husband. Something along those lines, anyway. But you get my drift, right?
A friend of mine is dating a guy who drinks quite regularly while she does not drink at all AND will not allow any drinking in her presence in the event that they get married. Immediately I thought, “How are you going to work that out?” Mind you, I’m coming from a similar situation from dating a man who smoked cigarettes. In the beginning, I saw his habit as part of his swag and a flaw that I could live with UNTIL I was living with it–literally! Do you really have a right to complain about something that someone does that they’d been doing when you first met them? Probably not, but we do it all of the time. Yep, I do too!
Back to my friend–she went on to explain that the “plan” is for him to only drinking certain rooms and when she’s not around. Hmmm, okay, I thought. That may work in the beginning BUT I can already hear him saying in the mist of one of those “after the honeymoon is over” arguments, “I can do what I want to do in MY OWN house!”
So, I’m just wondering why do we–men and women– fool ourselves into believing we can handle certain things about our mates/significant others when we really can’t? Differences in the areas of attending or not attending church, money management, parenting skills, cooking and cleaning habits all seem tolerable when we’re falling in love but they’re also the very same things that lead to divorce. Believe me, I know a thing or two about divorce!
What are your thoughts on this?